Discussion:The Affordable Boat Act

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Umk395 (talk|edits) said:

12 November 2013
The Affordable Boat Act

The U.S. government has just passed new legislation termed the “Affordable Boat Act" declaring that every citizen must purchase a new boat by April 15, 2014. These affordable boats will cost an average of $100,000 each. This does not include taxes, trailers, towing fees, licensing and registration fees, fuel, docking and storage fees, maintenance or repair costs.

This law has been passed because until now only wealthy and financially responsible people have been able to purchase boats. The law ensures that every American can now have a boat of their own since everyone is truly entitled to one. If you purchase your boat before the end of the year, you will receive 4 free life jackets, not including monthly usage fees.

In order to make sure everyone purchases a boat, the cost of owning a boat will increase between 250% and 400% per year. This way, wealthy people will pay more for something that other people don't want or can't afford to maintain. But to be fair, people who can't afford to maintain their boat will be regularly fined. Children under the age of 26 will be allowed to use their parents’ boat to party on until they turn 27 when they then must purchase a boat of their own.

If you already have a boat you can keep it unless the government determines that it doesn’t meet their standards as a good boat, in which case it will be taken from you and you will be required to purchase one from the new government Boat Vessel Exchange (BVE). If you don't want or don't need a boat, you will be required to purchase one anyway. Should you refuse to buy one, or can't afford one, you will be annually charged a penalty or a tax – call it what you want - until you do.

Failure to use the boat will also result in penalties/taxes. People living in the desert, inner cities, or other areas with no access a suitable body of water, are not exempt. Age, motion sickness, lack of experience or knowledge, are not acceptable excuses for not using your boat.

A government Boating Review Board (BRB) will decide when, where, how often, and for what purpose(s) you may use your boat. The BRB will also determine how many people may ride in your boat and whether or not you are too old or not healthy enough to be permitted to use your boat. Finding out whether your boat has outlived its usefulness and if you must purchase additional accessories or a newer and more expensive boat will also be accomplished by the BRB.

Those that can afford yachts will be required to purchase one and incur additional sales and use tax, after all, it's only fair. The BRB will also allocate names for each boat. Failure to comply with any of these rules and regulations will result in fines and possible imprisonment.

Lastly, Government officials are exempt from the Affordable Boat Act. If they want a boat, they and their families will be provided with one free of charge at the expense of taxpayers. Unions, bankers, and large corporations with the appropriate political affiliations are also exempt.

Nilodop (talk|edits) said:

12 November 2013
That's all very interesting, but is there a website where I can review my boat options and find out whether BRB will pay for my boat? Also, is there an exception for those of us who get seasick?

Captcook (talk|edits) said:

12 November 2013
^ Awesome!

Umk395 (talk|edits) said:

12 November 2013
Ahoy matey! Boats for everyone -- whether you like them or not!

Tenletters (talk|edits) said:

12 November 2013
If only the affordable care act had been as well thought out!

CathysTaxes (talk|edits) said:

12 November 2013
Bravo! Where can I get mine?

Tenletters (talk|edits) said:

13 November 2013
CathysTaxes, they are still working on the website. Should be any day week month um, pretty soon now

Umk395 (talk|edits) said:

13 November 2013
If you like your boat, you can keep your boat!

And it only runs on wind energy supplied by Solyndra!

MWPXYZ (talk|edits) said:

13 November 2013
Where are the subsidies? Without subsidies the boats won't be affordable. And if it isn't affordable it won't be popular (like Medicare and circuses). And if it isn't popular, there will be opponents who won't make it easy for bureaucrats, politicians, and insurance boat companies, marinas, and salvage companies to siphon off "their share" from the labyrinth.

CathysTaxes (talk|edits) said:

13 November 2013
Can I use my boat in my subdivision's retention pond?

Gazoo (talk|edits) said:

13 November 2013
The Elephants have been talking about this non-stop on the radio. They have made this thing sound so bad that ANY improvement to the website will be seen as a huge success. So the Elephants should not get too exicted and wet their stalls yet.

Yes, this website is Obama's Katrina, however, some people do like the AFA. Remember, the AFA came out of the conservative Heritage Foundation, and nothing that comes out of the Heritage Foundation is good. The public option was the only way to really hold private insurance premiums in check.

However, I hope the Elephants continue to backslap over this, because it will just make them bigger fools if Obama finally succeeds with it. We'll see. I'm looking forward to the inevitable day when we do the smart and efficient thing, and go to single payor.

CathysTaxes (talk|edits) said:

13 November 2013
The Democrats are making a big fuss as well. Even former President Clinton had something to say. The Democrats are ticked because the bigger rollout is next October 1st, right before election and they know their constituents are going to vote their pathetic butts out.

Umk395 (talk|edits) said:

13 November 2013
Hey, I'm just happy to be able to pay for maternity care (wife is 60 yrs old), substance abuse, contraceptives and other unnecessary coverage, comrade! Actually, not really. Policy was cancelled, premiums under the new "better", "affordable" plan went up 42%.

CathysTaxes (talk|edits) said:

14 November 2013
Me, too, UMK. As a Catholic, I'm happy to pay for someone else's abortions and life choices. The Republicans are trying to pass a bill to allow people to keep their existing plans. The Democrats don't want that. They need to tell US what coverage we need.

PDXTaxman (talk|edits) said:

14 November 2013
I fail to see how this discussion and others similar to it will help anyone grow or better run their tax business, which is the purpose of this area and the reason I come here. I really think it properly belongs over in the General Chat section.

CrowJD (talk|edits) said:

18 November 2013
I agree, move it over to general chat.

I am also a Catholic, and I was told by Mackelhenry that the Church has to offer it but they don't pay for it. If the Elephants won't help feed the babies, why are they so anxious that there be so many of them? Jesus fed the poor with fish and bread, but the real God of the Elephants is the dollar bill. They are a tribe of Idolators and most of them are going to h*ll where they can worship the Golden Calf and eat him with the Devil and call it church. The Elephants think they can mock God because of some things that Paul said (Paul was a false apostle, ie a fraud); in this they are gravely mistaken. Jesus made his pact with the poor (see Luke and trying actually reading it) and the whores and the oppressed, and not with gold.

Mackelhenry also told me that the Pope COMMANDED him to stop this obsessession with abortion and homosexuality because the Pope wisely sees this as a ruse by the American church to push Catholics to the Right. It didn't work, most of them voted for Obama anyway, despite the brainwashing.

Yes, it is 100% Obama's fault that the website did not work on time. The buck stops on his desk. Hurricane Larry Summers, top administration official, was warned three years ago by one Mr. Cutler (also a G man) that the whole website development effort was a total FU. What did "Hurricane Larry" do with this letter I leave for Mr. Issa to uncover and put in the record.

HHS/SMS dropped the ball here, not the private contractors. Same old story: too many government cooks in the kitchen and they would not give ONE government manager full authority to work with the vendors. The usual bad management and the President out on the golf course or the basketball court and not doing his job. Note to President: sometimes you have to ride a*s on the important projects....you cannot delegate everything, but you must get involved and follow up and stop the blame game.

Good News: USA Today Editorial from last Friday (keep in mind USA Today has moved to the Right) did criticize the Administration, but admitted that there was NO going back to the status quo, so the Elephants can dream on about that element of their fantasy. The Elephants have no real plan and the country knows it, and the status quo with 40,000,000 uninsured (USA Today's numbers) won't cut it. There are only so many votes that the GOP can illegally suppress.  :)

Gazoo (talk|edits) said:

19 November 2013
Crow, I second your opinion. Jesus had a preferential option for the poor, the whores and the oppressed and not because he wanted to "improve" them, or save them, but because he rightfully preferred their company to the crowd down at the Church (i.e. the Temple). This shows the wisdom of our Lord.

The Devil has certainly taken over the pulpit of the conservative Church in America today and therefore it is no suprise that the Devil's minions sit in its' many pews. God spoke to me this week (just like he spoke to George Bush before Iraq) and he told me that he has decided to call the conservative church up in what he referred to as the "Rupture". It's a new dispensation created by God. He is going to raise these Devil children about 1000 feet in the air and drop them down to the earth (in figurative terms, of course). This is God's plan to get rid of them and their pernecious effect on our once great country once and for all.

So all the conservatives and Tea Party can expect to be called up in the Rupture which will arrive like a thief in the night.

I've listened to the tapes of the Old Timey preachers and they were dead set against mixing government and the Church and they cast a very wary eye on Big Business. How things have changed today! You would think that the conservative Church is a mere subdivision of the U.S. Dept. of Commerce or the Chamber of Commerce....and the Lord needs to clear these vermin out of the Temple i.e. church, for good this time.

As far as the editorial in USA Today you reference above, that was in last Friday's "Weekend" edition of USA Today (a paper which now leans to the Right), and they made it quite clear that there would be no return to the status quo and the millions of uninsured we have today will get the help they need... and they put the number of uninsured at 40 million people.

Our President was grossly negligent in the discharge of his duties regarding the ACA, and I hope he loses some of his prideful ways and actually starts putting in some 10 hour days riding herd to make sure his government works. If not, he deserves what history will give him and right now that would be a grade of D I think.

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